Naama Tomaszpolski Ityel
What does it mean to do nothing? Is it resisting the internal and external impulses until we are sill or is it rather canceling the layer between the self and life and giving in to whatever moves us?
Breastfeeding my baby. One arm holds him, the other arm holds the phone. My eyes are moving in between the tiny warm being which is all about the here and now, and the infinite virtual planet of coulds, shoulds and what ifs. My mom calls. I talk to her WHILE checking my emails WHILE feeding my baby WHILE reminding my partner to take the garbage down. I find myself with overlapping tasks and dj-ing too many tracks at the same time. I’m addicted to deviated attention. Like that I feel awake, in control, functioning, with a future and a promised land. However, the accumulated undertone is of exhaustion, confusion and unable to be in touch and drink from the juice of life.
Am I afraid to die? to sink into the empty space and to dissolve into breastmilk? Can I simply rest within the present moment? I want to be able to do nothing. What does “doing nothing” means? Is it to resist the internal and external impulses until arriving to stillness? Or is it rather to cancel the layer between the self and existence and to give in to whatever moves me?
Choreography and dance Naama Tomaszpolski Ityel